iMarci

Since I’ve been a reading machine, I went ahead and changed my reading goal from 30 to 50. I might regret that in a month when I don’t feel like reading Ha! I go through phases with it so that wouldn't surprise me.

I am bringing my Kindle eReader with me on the cruise (T-11 days!!). I don't know if I will get a LOT of reading done, but I hope to get in some. I figure while the guys + Trisha are doing activities, I'll sit around reading on the beach or at the pool :P

We cruise for the Bahamas (with a stop in Florida) on Sunday, November 5th. While I have been on this cruise before (the destinations), the people I am going with are different (minus my two brothers). Trisha and three of our guy friends are joining us. I feel like it SHOULD be a lot of fun, but we will see haha. Spending a whole week with people you might only see once a month, could have a different effect than all-out shenanigans. But I am hoping for the all-out shenanigans. I need it.

I need this 'escape' from reality so bad. While my emotions have tapered off from Friday, I still have daily moments of panic that my dad is gone. I still have the sadness and the ache of missing him. That, and I just need a serious break from work.

People around here drive me absolutely bonkers 99% of the time. If it weren't for the amazing vacation/sick-time package, I would have bounced years ago ... but as it is, I will NEVER get another package like this. So I suffer the insanity of the people.

Folks around here think that giving me the 'silent treatment' will work on me. They fail to realize I am an introvert so their silence is 100% appreciated and wanted. Plus, you are in your fucking 60s ... WHY are you acting like a child and trying to give me the silent treatment? (Again, not complaining, just mind-boggling when this happens).

If someone approached you 10 minutes before 5pm (leaving time) on a Friday, and informed you that you had to stay late to use the PAPER CUTTER on a project THEY decided to start at 4:30 (and noticed they wouldn't finish in time), would that not royally piss you off? A project that has ZERO impact on the actual work of the establishment and is an 'extra' side thing they decided to do to make a poster look 'prettier' ... (I shit you not) ... a project that could have been done ALL WEEK LONG, but this person is the epitome of last minute shit. So they were 'upset' that I said no, I was leaving a 5pm and they knew very well how to use the damn paper cutter... SERIOUSLY?!

I just cannot make up half the shit that happens around here. I swear if I told people everything that goes on that drives me insane, most folks would assume I was a pathological liar because half the time I do not even believe that people with Master and PhD degrees act like this on a daily basis. The lack of actual common sense in these people has me in a constant state of 'wtfuckness'. It's so disturbing. Maybe I will write about it here because I really can't make heads or tails half the time.

*deep breath* Anyway ... I can't wait to be sipping fruity drinks in a week (and almost) half. Just escape these people and my life for a short period of time. Get lost in the waves, the books, and the drinks :P

I kind of do want to bring my laptop to try and sneak in some writing on my outline (for my book that I will never publish *sigh*), but I know better. I won't have time to write except maybe in the wee hours when we all go back to our respective rooms, but all Ill want to do then is either read or go straight to sleep.

I really want to publish a book. I've written so many things over the years and never had the nerve, but with my friend BDone trying to encourage me these past two years, I've gotten a little hopeful that MAYBE this time... I will work on something I'd like to actually publish. I dunno. Fear really sucks man. It paralyzes me so much. I am sure authors out there go through this heartpounding, what the hell am I thinking, moments, but they plug ahead. Me? I stumble back, tumble down a hill and land in a deep dark ditch, taking ages to crawl back out and attempt anything again for weeks. *Hangs head* The issues are strong in me.

Oh well... Im gonna end on this note. I am actually reading a book that has me laughing a little too hard at work, so going back to that to avoid these nutcases around me. :D